Part 2:Loving your child can prevent them from becoming criminals: Kumpenda mtoto kwaweza kumuepusha kuwa mhalifu

Habari mpendwa mzazi,

Kwenye post yangu ya mwisho nilianza hii mada ya kumpenda mtoto, na leo naomba nielezee kuhusu Child Abuse, au unyanyasaji wa watoto ambao umeonekana kuwa chanzo kikubwa sana cha kusababisha watoto kuja kuwa wahalifu wanapokuwa watu wazima.

Ni muhimu kufahamu kuhusu unyanyasaji huu maana inawezekana ukawa unaufanya au ulishafanya bila kujua au kuna mtu karibu anafanya na hujajua kuwa ni unyanyasaji na hivyo kufahamu kunaweza kusaidia jamii yetu kuacha huu unyanyasaji. Ni muhimu pia kujua kwa sababu jamii ya kitanzania tunakuwa na familia kubwa sana, mzazi kufahamu kuhusu huu unyanyasaji unaweza kufundisha watoto wako na hivyo ikawasaidia kujikinga na matukio kama hayo kama yatatokea kwao ukiwa haupo nao.

Kwenye post ya nyuma tumeona kuwa familia ni sehemu ya muhimu sana ya ukuaji wa mtoto, ni hapa ambapo identity ya mtu inatengenezwa, na kama mazingira ya nyumbani hayako vizuri kwa ukuaji wa mtoto itamuathiri mtoto kisaikolojia. Ni muhimu pia kukumbuka kuwa sio kila mtoto anayekuwa kwenye mazingira mabaya anakuja kuwa mbaya ila inachangia kwa asilimia kubwa sana.

Mazingira mabovu au hatarishi haimaanishi kuishi kwenye nyumba ambayo si ya kisasa, hasha, mtoto anaweza kuishi kwenye gorofa na nyumba nzuri sana yenye kila kitu ila akawa kwenye mazingira hatarishi.

"There is no doubt that direct experience with violence and neglect during childhood, increases the risk of violent behavior during adulthood. However not all children victims turn to violence later in life."

Unyanyasaji wa mtoto ni nini? What is Child Abuse?

Shirika la afya duniani (WHO), wemeeleza unyanyasaji wa watoto kuwa ni, "is any behavior directed toward a child by a parent, guardian, care giver, other family member, or other adult, that endangers or impairs a child’s physical or emotional health and development."-ni tabia yoyote inayoelekezwa kwa mtoto na mzazi , mlezi, mtoa huduma , mwanafamilia, au watu wazima wengine , ambalo linahatarisha au kuzuia maendeleo ya kiafya ya mtoto kimwili au kihisia.

Aina za unyanyasaji/Types of child abuse

Kuna aina nne (4) za unyanyasaji wa watoto

1. Sexual Abuse/ Unyanyasaji wa kingono
2. Neglect/ Utelekezaji
3. Emotional Abuse/Unyanyasaji wa kihisia
4. Physical Abuse/Unyanyasaji wa kimwili

Itaendelea............

ATM

Part 1: Loving your Child can prevent them from becoming criminals: Kumpenda mtoto kwaweza kumuepusha kuja kuwa muhalifu

Habari wapenzi wasomaji,

 "There is no doubt that direct experience with violence and neglect during childhood, increases the risk of violent behaviour during adulthood. However not all children victims turn to violence later in life. " Maryam Falahati.

Wiki iliyopita nilikuta kwenye page ya Youtube kwenye laptop yangu, makala inayoitwa "Deadly Women", nilidhani ni tamthilia baada ya kuitazama nikagundua ni habari za ukweli za wanawake katili sana duniani wauwaji. Kusema ukweli inasikitisha sana. Nilisikitika kuona kuwa mwanamke anaweza kuwa katili kiasi cha kuua mtu na kupika nyama yake....jamani ni hatari sana.

Sasa lililonisikitisha sana na kusababisha nitengeneze post ya leo ni ukweli kuwa story za hawa wanawake makatili hivi, zinaonyesha kuwa maisha yao ya utotoni hayakuwa mazuri kabisa. Na wengine mazingira ya familia zao majumbani yaliwapelekea kuwa hivyo walivyo. Sasa mie nikaona nije kushare na ninyi kautafiti kadogo sana nilichokifanya baada ya kuangalia hiyo makala, maana kama tunataka kupona tuambiane haya mapemaa.

Katika Jarida la polisi la saikolojia ya makosa ya jinai la mwaka 2005 walichapisha haya,

 "Perhaps one of the most interesting factors contributing to the development of a serial killer is abuse that is experienced in the killer’s childhood. Childhood abuse has been given varying levels of blame in the development of serial killers. De Becker (1997) quoted Ressler’s research and stated that “100 percent [of serial killers] had been abused as children, either with violence, neglect, or humiliation” (p. 55). Ressler and Shachtman (1992) report that, “over 40 percent of the [serial] murderers reported being physically beaten and abused in their childhoods. More than 70 percent said they had witnessed or been part of sexually stressful events when young…” (p. 85)." Journal of Police and Criminal Psychology, 2005, Volume 20, Number 1.

Yaani ni hivi hao watu wanaoitwa serial killers, yaani mtu anayeua watu zaidi ya watatu katika matukio zaidi ya matatu tofauti, asilimia 100 ya hao watu walifanyiwa vitendo vya udhalilishaji na unyanyasaji wakiwa watoto. Zaidi ya 40% ya hao wauwaji walipigwa na kudhalilishwa wakiwa watoto na zaidi ya 70% wamekuwa mashahidi au wamekuwa sehemu ya vitendo vya kingono wakiwa watoto. Hii ni hatari.



 "The family is the most important and the original institution of society for bringing up and protecting children. However this same institution can be the cause of violence, pain and suffering. All over this planet, women and children are murdered, maimed, are assaulted and battered, and sold. Millions of human beings are suffering in the confines of their families, and unfortunately knowledge and information about this is only the tip of the iceberg, an iceberg that still many believe it to be their private domain." Maryam Falahati.

Itaendelea......

ATM

Books! Books! Books! Vitabu! Vitabu! Vitabu!

Habari za siku nyingi?

Sijaposti siku nyingi ila mambo yote ni mema.

Nilipokuwa na mimba ya miezi kama mitano( 5)/sita (6) hivi nilipita kwenye bookshop moja na kununua vitabu vitatu (3) kwa ajili ya Genesis. Hivyo ndio vilikuwa vitu vya kwanza kabisa nilivyonunua kwa ajili ya mtoto wangu.

Wazungu wanasema, "A child can not have too many books" (Mtoto hawezi kuwa na vitabu vingi kupita kiasi).

Najua wengi wetu hatuna mazoea ya kusoma vitabu na sijui kama wengine mnatamani kama mimi kuwa kizazi chetu kiwe tofauti.

Nilipokuwa O'level nilipata bahati ya kusoma na watu waliokuwa very talented (Nitaleta habari zao hapa siku nyingine), hawa watu walikuwa wakifanya vizuri sana darasani na nilijua siri yao ilikuwa ni nini, WALIKUWA WANASOMA SANA VITABU. Ngoja nikwambie hakuna short cut ya kulisha akili yako na ya mtoto wako zaidi ya kusoma vitabu SANA.

Baba yangu alitusomea sana vitabu na jamani amejitahidi kununua vitabu sana kwa ajili yetu, baadhi ya vitu ninavyojua leo nisingejua kama isingekuwa juhudi ya baba yangiu ya kutusomea vitabu jioni.

Baba yangu hana elimu kubwa sana ila anajua mambo meengi sana kuna wakati nilidhani ananidanganya maana kila swali nikimuuliza anajibu lake, ila nilipokuwa mtu mzima kidogo niligundua kuwa baba yangu anapenda kusoma sana jamani, anasoma literally kila kitu.

Wataalamu wa mambo ya watoto wanasema ni vema kuanza kumsomea mtoto akiwa tumboni...soma tu maana anauwezo wa kusikia sauti yako na anapozaliwa anza kumsomea, haelewi maneno yako ila anajifunza kuwa msikivu (jambo ambalo ni adimu sana).

Kuna faida nyingi za kuanza kumsomea mtoto wako mapema, chache ni

• Inasaidia kuongeza na kujifunza misamiati
• Inachochea uwezo wa mtoto kujenga picha ya jambo (Imagination)
• Inafundisha ujuzi wa kuwasiliana (Communication skills)

Kama umewahi kusoma kitabu kinachoitwa Gifted Hand kilichoandikwa na Ben Carson unaweza kuelewa ni nini maana ya kupenda kusoma vitabu, tabia ya kusoma vitabu ilimsaidia Dr. Ben kutoka kuwa wa mwisho darasani mpaka kuwa daktari bingwa wa matibabu ya kichwa duniani. Kwanini wa kwako asisome?

Kama unataka kumnunulia mtoto zawadi, kanunue vitabu, hutajuta

Make a difference, read books, be the difference, be their role model.

Bonyeza link hapo chini kwa taarifa zaidi:

http://www.babycenter.com/0_reading-to-your-baby_368.bc#articlesection1. 

ATM.